I Am Eowyn
by Noelerin
Summary: It Lives! Eowyn tells Merry her story, not cannon. Added an actual ending.
1. Prologue to Part 2

Disclaimer: I don't own anything but the idea.  
  
Author's Note: Inspired by a program on the Amazon women. So, you can bet that it is totally non-cannon. Does not relate to my other piece. Thanks for the encouragement.  
  
Prologue:  
  
How did I come to be here? Heading into the midst of a great battle, into the thick of things. Oh, yes, this it what I was trained for. What I was born and bred for. Eowyn thought, staring in front of her. Merry shifted restlessly in the saddle before her. "Nervous?"  
  
Merry almost didn't answer, afraid that he might disgust this seasoned warrior. But something about his companion allowed him to believe that he wouldn't be scorned. "Yes."  
  
"It is the same with everyone who desires to fight. It is normal." Echoes of a previous conversation, the warrior mused idly.  
  
Merry shook his head in disbelief. "I find that hard to believe after all I have seen and experienced these past days. You must not know that I have been in the company of the warriors Aragorn of Arathorn, Legolas of Mirkwood, Gimli, son of Gloin, Boromir of Gondor, and Gandalf. We saw and fought in many a battle to get this far. Even my friends have shown themselves to be brave in the face of opposition."  
  
"Do you think they started out as confident as they are now? Have you not yourself shown courage in the face of adversity by persisting-even when your common sense told you otherwise?" The warrior revealed before Merry could answer the question. "I was terrified before my first battle."  
  
"Really?" Merry asked, looking up at the warrior. "Tell me about it."  
  
Eowyn was silent for a moment, then she spoke. "I cannot tell you now. Ask me after the battle is over, if you can bear to look at me."  
  
"Why wouldn't I be able to?"  
  
"You will understand after the battle." There was a loud roar as the men rushed into the battle. The mighty horses of Rohan thundered over the ground, shaking the earth below them.  
  
Days Later:  
  
The House of Healing, Gondor.  
  
Merry walked slowly into Eowyn's room, not surprised to find that the bed was empty. He looked around and saw her forlorn figure. She was in front of the window, her broken arm cradled in a sling. "What was your first battle like?"  
  
She slowly turned, blinking her eyes to adjust to the dimness of the room after the brightness of the sun. "You want to know? Even now?"  
  
"You understood when no one else would. You listened to me while others ignored me. Yes, I want to know." Merry answered, sitting down in the only chair in the room.  
  
"Very well." Her voice was brisk, but there was a strange note of reluctance in it. Eowyn leaned against the window frame, eyes focused on Merry. "I am more than the niece of the king, sister to the heir. I am Eowyn, Shield Maiden of Rohan, servant to her majesty, Queen Idis."  
  
"Who is Queen Idis?" Merry asked.  
  
"She is the leader of an elite team of women warriors known as the Shield Maidens of Rohan. Only the best and the brightest survive training. I will start my tale from there because you will only understand if I tell you everything."  
  
Chapter One:  
  
Queen Idis.  
  
The hall of the Shield Maidens was filled with the sounds of women preparing to depart. One of their own, the Lady Theodwyn, had fallen in battle. They were going to do her honor. King Theoden would be expecting them in a week's time.  
  
Queen Idis strode into the room, a bag slung over her shoulder. She stopped in the center of the room and spoke, never once raising her voice. "We are going into our sister's brother's land. King Theoden and his people have different values than our own. While we are there we must behave with dignity. Men do not trust us as they once did because of outside influences working upon them. Let us remind them of who we are, why we have been so honored by Rohan Kings in the past."  
  
"Does that mean we cannot defend ourselves against unwanted attentions?" Helena asked. She was a tall woman with blue eyes and long, blue hair. Of all the warriors there, she had been with Idis the longest. They were friends from the early days, they had trained together.  
  
"No. But we must not and will not provoke them." Idis looked at each of the women, her gray eyes were serious. "Let us mount up and ride, sisters."  
  
King Theoden stood upon the roof, showing his land to his fallen sister's children. "And there is where your mother made her move, the one that allowed us victory."  
  
Eowyn was silent but Eomer questioned his uncle. "Why did you allow mother to do it?"  
  
"No one can tell your mother what to do, my boy." His voice was gently chiding. "She is who she is."  
  
"Look!" Eowyn cried out, pointing to the horizon. In the distance, they could see that horses were heading their way. "Who is that?"  
  
"Queen Idis." Theoden said, turning to go downstairs.  
  
Eomer asked, trying to place the name. He knew he'd heard it somewhere before. "Who?"  
  
He turned, his eyes were solemn. "She is the leader of the Shield Maidens. It is an honor to have her visit." Eowyn and Eomer followed him as he walked to the doors. "Queen Idis." He greeted with a sad smile, thinking of the woman before him and remembering her only as his daughter.  
  
"King Theoden." She jumped off the moving horse and landed on her feet, bowing before him. It was a smooth move his own men would envy. The horse stopped and walked back to her obediently. Her warriors dismounted and bowed in homage before moving towards their campsite.  
  
She watched them for a moment, smiling in approval of Helena's actions. "I am sorry that we must meet under such tragic circumstances. I wish that it were otherwise. Theodwyn will be sorely missed."  
  
"As would I, lady." Theoden said. Turning around, he waved the children to come closer. "May I present to you my sister's children. The Lady Eowyn and the Lord Eomer."  
  
Eowyn studied the queen before her as she bowed. Queen Idis was not what she expected for the ruler of warriors. She was a woman who barely came up to Theoden's shoulder. Her hair fell down her back in waves of red. There was no sign that she carried weapons.  
  
The callused hands raised the girl's chin. She studied her intently, focusing on what was written in her eyes. "Yes. There is good blood in this one. She will return with us when we leave in the spring."  
  
"But she is a child!" Theoden protested.  
  
"All the better for her to learn what she needs to. She is more ours than yours." There was steel in her voice, a warning that in this she would not be denied. "Do not trifle with me, Theoden."  
  
And Eowyn knew why this woman was queen. There was an undeniable sense of power about her. A sense that no man would dare to stand against her. "I do not fear what is to be. This is my path, let me be." The girl said.  
  
Eomer didn't understand all that was happening but he did see that the strange queen was changing his sister before his eyes. The timid, shy girl he had always known was standing straight and tall. He'd only ever seen one person stand like that. Their mother. It was as though, for one moment, she was with them again. "Uncle, this is what mother would want." He quietly said, offering tentative support to the plan.  
  
With both children voicing mutual support, Theoden had no choice but to recant his words. "Very well. But let her enjoy childhood a little longer."  
  
"It will be as you wish." Idis consented, turning around and leading her horse away.  
  
"If only it was." He murmured.  
  
The winter passed swiftly. Eowyn spent much of it divided between the warriors and family. Inside her spirit, an excitement burned but was tinged with sorrow. "What is the matter with me?" She muttered. "I should be happy to go, most do not make it into that core of women warriors."  
  
"No, they do not. It is an honor one should not take lightly, princess." The voice of Tacatta said. A girl of average height and features that were neither fair nor foul was standing behind her. On her arm was a circlet of silver, denoting her as a novice. "Yet you have made it. Why do you not seem happy?"  
  
"I am leaving all I know behind to join a world I know so little of. Is that not indeed reason enough for fear?"  
  
"Only if that fear inhibits you from doing what you know should." Tacatta answered. Her hand extended, revealing the knife by her side. It was the first sign of a weapon that Eowyn had seen. "I am Tacatta."  
  
"Eowyn." She shook her hand firmly. "But you already knew that, though I don't believe that I've ever seen you."  
  
She nodded, not elaborating further. "Your mother was the finest warrior of the shield maidens, after Idis."  
  
"So they say." Eowyn was doubtful and it showed. "But I have never seen proof."  
  
"Was not her courageous stand in battle enough proof of that?" She questioned.  
  
"She lost."  
  
"It is not winning or losing a battle that makes a warrior." Idis said, walking around the corner. "It is in making the attempt. Your mother knew that well."  
  
The slight reproach in the voice of the queen caused Eowyn to hang her head in shame. "I meant no disrespect."  
  
"No, I know that you did not. Child, you must learn to think before you speak." Idis placed a hand on her shoulder. "But you are young and a quick study. I saw you ride yesterday. You have improved."  
  
"Thank you." Eowyn said, cheeks slightly red. Her horsemanship before Helena had taken her under her wing was something of a joke-especially for one who had been raised among horses.  
  
"We leave at dawn tomorrow and will wait for no one. Not even you, princess." Idis stared hard at her, reiterating. "You will be there before the rest of us, dressed in the clothes that you will find on your bed or you will not go. Your horse is your responsibility to saddle and care for. No one else will do it for you. Say your farewells tonight because you will not be allowed to speak until we reach our lands. This is to show that you are putting off the old world to enter the new. You will be invisible to all of us. We will not speak to you. We will not hear you. We will not address you." Idis paused and stared at her. "Do I make myself clear?"  
  
Eowyn nodded slowly, slightly terrified at the thought of not really existing for an unknown length of time. For she knew that they would not be going immediately to the lands where the Shield Maidens dwelled during the spring. Idis said nothing and she realized that the queen wanted to hear the words that she understood and accepted it. "Yes. After tonight, I am to be as silent as the stars. And as visible as the air."  
  
"Yet even the stars have a way of speaking. And air a way of being felt." Idis reassured her, recognizing the fear in the eyes of the girl before her. A part of the queen knew that Eowyn was too young for the training. But she also knew that if the girl wasn't taken with them now, she never would be. Her fragile wings would be clipped by the involuntary overprotection of the males of Rohan.  
  
The next day, before dawn, Eowyn was saddling her horse. Her brown outfit denoted her as a warrior initiate. On her feet were knee high boots, a little large for her but she would grow into them. Her blonde hair was pulled back tightly, bound by a ribbon of black. A bag carrying the things that she was allowed to take with her rested on the ground. She picked it up and strapped it to the saddle.  
  
Queen Idis walked past her, ignoring her presence entirely as she greeted everyone. Turning towards the stairs, she bowed to King Theoden. "Once again, I thank you for your hospitality."  
  
"And we bid thee welcome to stay with us anytime you pass this way." He responded graciously, seeking his niece in the midst.  
  
Eowyn kept her eyes trained to the ground. Her life had ended the moment Idis appeared.  
  
"Mount up!" Idis called, gracefully leaping into the saddle.  
  
As Eomer and Theoden watched, Eowyn mounted and rode away. She never turned around to wave farewell.  
  
Chapter Two:  
  
Traveling and Training.  
  
Eowyn was trying to be stoic, suppressing her groans of pain. Never in her life had she ridden this far and with so little preparation for it. They had been riding for twenty-four hours straight, not even stopping to eat.  
  
Finally, Idis' hand rose and they stopped beside a river. It was swollen beyond the banks and she called for a vote. "Shall we risk the water and cross, or rest?"  
  
Not surprisingly, the women voted to cross. "For we are not tired nor are our horses weary." Helena summarized their feelings with her words.  
  
Eowyn was amazed by their strength and character. She was filled with a sense of doubt about her abilities to be among such women. The water rushed by furiously as they entered into it. Crossing the river was an exercise of restraint for Eowyn as the cold water chilled her legs and the powerful surge pushed against her. Gripping the horse as she'd been taught, she forced them to continue.  
  
Idis watched her struggle against the water covertly. It wouldn't do for the girl to know that she was being observed and tested. But what the queen saw reiterated her first impression of her. Eowyn was like her mother, she was obstinate and would endure. If only the other initiate proved to be half as strong. She had chosen her with great reluctance. There was something that didn't feel right about the girl.  
  
They journeyed until night began to fall before setting up camp. Some of the women set about make a fire, which was soon roaring in the night, warming the chilled bones of the women as they settled around it. A few of the women went hunting and brought back fresh meat, which was now roasting nicely in the blaze. To compliment the meat, there were fruits and vegetables, as well as some toasted bread.  
  
Eowyn sat beside the only other initiate that had been picked up. The other girl was older and looked tougher than Eowyn did. Her name was Rylia. She had her spiky black hair and green eyes, which were glaring at Idis rebelliously at the moment. Obviously, she hadn't liked riding without rest and would've preferred to stay on the other side of the river instead of crossing it.  
  
They waited for the others to get their dinner before approaching the fire and grabbing what was left. Toasted mushrooms, roasted meat, and some dried fruit. They ate in silence, most ravenously hungry after their long ride.  
  
"Good evening, ladies." A voice called from the darkness. A man emerged after the voice, followed by some other men. Eowyn thought they were rangers but something about them didn't gel with what she knew about them. Instantly, she was on her guard. Glancing around, she realized that the others felt the same way she did. "Would you mind if we joined you?"  
  
"Actually, we would." Idis said, her voice was cold. "Our mission is one of cleansing. We desire no company this night."  
  
He bowed, taking in the group they were surrounded by. "I understand, Queen Idis. May we at least stay for a moment and warm ourselves by your fire?"  
  
"I suppose that would be all right." Idis was reluctant. Helena and Narvanata moved to stand with the initiates and the novices.  
  
It was a subtle shift that would've been missed had Grima not been watching for it. "We mean you no harm." He softly reiterated, sending the men with him a warning glance. They understood and moved to stand in front of the fire.  
  
But Idis had seen the way he'd been watching them. Already the women were packing their things, getting ready to leave. "You may have this fire. We are leaving."  
  
"If you must." He stopped. A flash of blonde light caught his eye. There. He'd seen the one his master had sent him to find.  
  
'Do nothing.' A voice whispered on the breeze. 'Let them leave.'  
  
'Should we not follow after them?'  
  
'Do not. We do not have their permission to go there. The land is protected by magic that we are not strong enough to break.' His voice was stern. 'Again I say, let them leave in peace.'  
  
'As you command, I obey.' He answered, gesturing for the men to leave the warriors alone. Through half-closed eyes, he watched the girl and desired her.  
  
Eowyn didn't understand why but she knew that the leader was watching her specifically. It made her want to rush through her preparations. The only thing that made her be careful was the knowledge that if she lost anything, it could never be replaced. Muscles protesting, she mounted her horse on Idis' command and they were off once more.  
  
Two days later, they entered the mountain range at the edge of King Theoden's land. Once they passed through them, they would be in the land of the Shield Maidens. Land that no man had stepped foot on without invitation since it had been given to them in the days of the elders. Idis turned and smiled at the two initiates. "Congratulations. You have passed the first test. Take care of your horses, then you may bathe."  
  
"Thank the goddess." Rylia muttered, climbing down. Her voice had a slightly musical quality to it but was raw sounding.  
  
Eowyn slowly climbed down, she didn't speak seeing Idis' frown. But the queen didn't reprimand Rylia, so the blonde girl wondered what her look meant. She followed Helena into the bathhouse and looked around. It was a large building built over a natural spring of hot water. Along one wall was a long bench where clothes and towels rested. There was a door on the opposite wall from the one they entered and she wondered what that was for.  
  
Shrugging her questions aside, she climbed into the water and scrubbed the mud and sweat from her skin. Feeling refreshed, she relaxed in the water. After they'd bathed, they quickly dressed in their clean clothes. Narvanata appeared at the door Eowyn had wondered about. She was the first dark skinned woman Eowyn had ever met and she was not at all like the stories she'd been told.  
  
She had warm, brown eyes and hair the color of ebony. "Come with me." In contrast to her warm nature, her voice was harsh sounding. Looking closely, one would find the reason for it. A thin scar was on her throat, received in a fight when she fled Mordor.  
  
Without question, they did as she asked. She led them into the throne room where Idis waited, bowed respectfully to the queen before moving to stand behind her. The girls knelt on the ground and remained there, watching her pass them.  
  
Queen Idis studied the kneeling girls, noting the tan they'd gained on the journey with approval. "It is my pleasure to lift the ban from your tongues."  
  
"Thank you." The girls chorused.  
  
"Helena will be in charge of your training, which will begin tomorrow." Idis stopped when a cloaked figure entered the room. "Yes, I'opia?" It was the high priestess, the only one who had authority to challenge her.  
  
"Not that one." She said, pointing to Rylia. "She is more priestess than warrior material."  
  
The queen nodded, I knew she did not feel right. "Then, if she is willing, she is yours."  
  
Rylia felt an aged hand tilt her chin up and met a pair of eyes. She studied the face before her as she was studied by those jade eyes. It was full of life lines but it was also an ageless face framed by silver hair. This was who she had come to meet, Rylia knew it as she knew her own name. "I am your servant."  
  
The staff hit the ground with a resounding crack. "You are." I'opia decreed. "I will take her now."  
  
Idis watched them go, then looked down at Eowyn. "Go with Helena. She will show you what you are to do."  
  
"Yes, majesty." Eowyn rose and followed her teacher out the door.  
  
They walked along the rocky terrain towards a spot just beyond the huts of the woman. On the ground was a pile of animal skins and sticks. "What is this?" Eowyn asked, bending down to pick through them.  
  
"These are yours to build your shelter. But be wise in how you build for it will be your home until we journey to our place of summering. A word of caution, do not waste anything. If you need to, take a look at the houses that surround you, but you may not ask for help. One of the things you need to learn is self-reliance. It is up to you to take care of yourself for you will not always have others to help you." Then she left Eowyn alone, staring at the pile in disbelief.  
  
"Wait!" She called, glad that Helena stopped. "May I ask for advice?"  
  
"That is allowed." She said, then disappeared.  
  
Eowyn first sorted through her pile, taking note of everything as she organized it. Then she went around and studied the houses. She looked inside and noted how they were bound together. After making a few attempts to build her shelter, she went searching for the women. Working steadily, she built a crude shelter.  
  
She stepped back and critically examined the dwelling. "Well, in my humble opinion , it looks like one good breeze will topple it." Laughing a little at her work but she was proud of her achievement.  
  
"I have to agree with you there." A voice behind her said. Eowyn turned around and saw Tacatta standing there. "But we may just make a warrior of you after all."  
  
"You think so?"  
  
Tacatta walked around the building, hand on her check as she looked it over seriously. "I do."  
  
Eowyn smiled. "I'm beginning to believe it myself. Did you need something of me?" She knew that as an initiate, she was to be servant to all the other woman-even the novices.  
  
"No, just wanted to check on you." She stood by her side, studying her. "Yes, I think you will make it through. Tell me, where's Rylia? Shouldn't she be helping you?"  
  
"She would've but was claimed by someone named I'opia."  
  
Tacatta paled. "The high priestess? I don't envy her. What she'll go through will make what we do seem like child's play."  
  
"Really?" Eowyn now felt worry for her, were there had only been mild concern.  
  
"Yes. She will need to walk the fine line of our world and the spirit world." She explained. "Rylia will need to be a priestess but she will also need to learn the weapons of a warrior. Come, let us go to dinner."  
  
Side by side, they walked to the main hall and knelt down. "Why do we sit like this?"  
  
"We are always training. Everything we do is a part of that." The novice explained, reaching out to grab an item from the table. "This is to help develop our knee muscles, keeping them limber." She paused, handing Eowyn something before she advised her. "Better eat now. If I'm not mistaken, you begin training tomorrow. Which means, you won't eat until dinner time."  
  
"Let me guess, training your body to accept limitations?"  
  
"In a way." She said. "It is more of a way of disciplining you to ignore your physical body's cravings."  
  
Bright and early the next morning, Helena found Eowyn waiting outside her hut. She handed her a spear and led her to a clearing. Demonstrating a few moves, she indicated that Eowyn was to copy her-and not make a sound no matter what happened.  
  
At first the moves were simple, merely moving from side to side. But then Helena started to swing the spear back and forth, then twisted it around her body as she moved side to side. Eowyn followed her, nervous when she noticed that some of the women were watching them.  
  
Once she got the rhythm down, Helena would change patterns. She tossed the spear high into the air and turned around, catching it while she was looking down at the ground. In a smooth move, she angled it across the ground, jumping over it smoothly. The spear went up, Helena twirled around and caught it in a smooth motion. Then she tossed Eowyn a challenging look, daring her to do the same.  
  
Gritting her teeth, she tried. The spear went up several times and each time she missed. The sun rose higher in the sky and the women began to jeer, to mock her inability to accomplish such a simple thing. Ignoring them as best as she could, Eowyn concentrated on the spear. Slowly, she passed it from hand to hand, then she tossed it high into the air. Bending down, she thrust out her hand in the area she hoped it would land.  
  
She nearly gasped when it smacked the palm of her hand, which closed automatically. Concentrating on her next move, she tried to follow the pattern Helena had established. She tripped over her own feet, hitting the hard ground. A trickle of blood trailed down her cheek as she stood up. Wiping it away, she began again. And again. And again.  
  
The sun was now setting. It was almost time to quit for dinner. Every muscle protesting, her ears ringing with the words of the crowd, she tried it one last time. Forcing herself to relax, to focus only on the stick in her hand, she tossed it up. Bending down in the well-known pattern, she caught it smoothly. Taking a deep breath, the spear hit the ground and she leapt over it. Then she tossed it up, twirled around and caught it.  
  
Around her there was clapping and hooting as the women cheered for her. "Not bad." Helena said, then she turned and walked away.  
  
Eowyn was confused by her teacher's actions. Was she supposed to follow after her or stay there and practice some more?  
  
Narvanata took pity on her confusion and approached. "You're allowed to mingle with us now. Helena has just gone to give her report to Queen Idis."  
  
"Oh." Shrugging, she went with Narvanata to meet the other women.  
  
Queen Idis and Helena watched as she walked away. "She is gifted, majesty." Helena said quietly. "I have never seen anyone pick up on the moves so completely. Usually they can only do half of the dance before dinnertime."  
  
"Undoubtedly." Idis said, her brow was wrinkled in concern. "But she is so young. Do you think we ask to much of her?"  
  
Her reply was simple, direct. "She is your blood. And I'opia is never wrong."  
  
As her training progressed, Eowyn found that her muscles protested less and that she was able to do more. The only thing I have a problem with is this shelter. It leaks when it rains and is cold when the wind blows hard enough. She thought, I really must learn to do better.  
  
"Helena, do we dislike men? Is that why we live apart from them?" She asked one day when they were fixing spears damaged in a hunt.  
  
"No. We chose not to live with them but we do not hate them." Helena said, putting down the spear she was fixing the point on. "Where did you hear that?"  
  
"I didn't hear it anywhere." She replied, keeping her head bent to her work.  
  
"Do you not know the story of how we got our start?"  
  
Eowyn shook her head, finishing the spear in her lap. She reached for another but Helena stopped her.  
  
"Kneel beside me and I will tell you." She waited until the girl was settled. "I'm sure you know of the ring of power that Sauron had forged."  
  
"Yes."  
  
"That ring's power reached far and wide. One of the kings, the leader of the ring wraiths in fact, was from Rohan. He took with him all the men to serve under Sauron, leaving our land defenseless. In the beginning, it did not matter because Sauron had promised to leave our land alone. But he lied. By the time his intentions became clear, the king had lost all feeling of loyalty to his home. Sauron figured he had an easy victory.  
  
"After all, there was only women and children left in the land. Who would stop him? He unleashed a reign of terror. But he forgot that a mother will not stand back and let her children be hurt. A mother would rather die than see her children sold into slavery. The women rose, took up the arms that were left and fought back. These women drove back the invaders and reclaimed the land as their own. They fought for their children. For their homes and for their freedom. They fought for the right to live in the light. In doing so, they regained the men that were lost and the respect of kings.  
  
"Many died, but many more lived and rode into that last battle beside elves and men. One of them even fought beside Isildur and saw the ring that Sauron bore fall to the ground. She despised the thing, believed that it should be destroyed for the horror that it caused. That woman became the first queen of the Shield Maidens. It was she who helped organize the women in the beginning. And though she hated the ring and all it stood for, she was a faithful friend and servant to Isildur for all of his days. That is why we have no affiliation to any country or king."  
  
~~~~~~~~~  
  
Eowyn stopped suddenly, her fists clenched together so tightly that the blood left them. "You'd better go now, Merry." Pain laced her words.  
  
"I don't understand."  
  
Her smile was bitter. "I don't expect you to. We'll talk tomorrow." She turned around, staring out the window at the darkened sky sightlessly  
  
He reluctantly stood, not wanting to leave her like this. "Lady Eowyn?"  
  
"Leave." There was no arguing with her. She waited until his footsteps faded down the hall before she collapsed in tears.  
  
~~~~~~~~~  
  
Merry walked into the room and looked for Lady Eowyn. "She's not here." A voice said from somewhere behind him.  
  
"Where is she?" He turned to the nurse. "I thought that there were orders given that she was not supposed to leave."  
  
"There are. She has gone into the garden."  
  
The hobbit was confused, why would she want to go to such a dead place? "Thank you."  
  
"You're welcome." She looked at him, giving him precise instructions. "Go out the door and turn left, follow the hall until you come to a pair of double doors. You'll find her there."  
  
Following her instructions, he saw her sitting on a bench. "Lady Eowyn?"  
  
"If you're going to be my friend, Merry, call me Eowyn." She softly requested, not raising her eyes.  
  
"All right, Eowyn." He stumbled over her name, then sat down across from her. "Why were you so upset yesterday?"  
  
"I am a warrior. I should have gone into battle under my own shield and standard. Among my own people, I held a place of respect. The Shield Maidens should have been called into battle. They were not. And I, I who had something to regain, had to resort to subterfuge. I had to disguise myself to enter the field, like some thief." She spat the words at him, anger darkening her eyes. "I chose to be a coward and hide behind a man's identity in order to fight. I have dishonored the women I was chosen to become by my behavior."  
  
Merry wasn't sure what to say to that and was quiet, till the rage left her eyes. "So, what happened?"  
  
"More training." She shrugged listlessly, recalling her story. "I grew up under their care."  
  
It was a gentle push. "And your first battle?"  
  
Her eyes finally rose to meet his, a wealth of pain in them. Taking a deep breath, she continued to tell her story. "It was a few years after I joined them, I was a novice. That day I left childhood and became an adult." 


	2. Parts 3 to 5

Part 3:  
  
Becoming a warrior in deed.  
  
Eowyn sat nervously on her horse, eyes wide as she took in the scene before her. Never in all her life had she seen such an assembled force. They had been called by her uncle to help with an unusual amount of orc activity to their north. His main army was battling along the east and southern parts of the kingdom. In the air was a growing sense of menace. Tacatta sat on her horse a few feet from her, still as a statue. But Eowyn had known her long enough to see that she was frightened.  
  
"Nervous, Kittiwake?" Helena asked, using the name that had found Eowyn. Because of her family's status, it was decided that she would go by another name. After their first encounter with the strangers, they thought it best to hide her identity from the outside world. Now, only a few truly remembered who she was. The second in command rode up beside her, calm on the wild horse she always rode.  
  
Eowyn could only nod. She felt as though if she spoke, it would be no more than a squeak, revealing her inexperience.  
  
"It is always thus with ones first battle. Fear quickens the blood and choices are made. It is only when a decision to fight-even against insurmountable odds, that a warrior is born. You need not fear for yourself. You have trained hard and it will kick in once you are there." She caught the disbelieving look that Eowyn sent her. She smiled. "You find that hard to believe? So did I when I was your age."  
  
"You've fought in battles?" She asked, struggling with her long hair. In the confusion of the ride, she had forgotten to pull it back like the others.  
  
Helena nodded. "Here, let me do that." Confident hands took hold of the hair and twisted it firmly before tying it in a knot. "That will hold better than any ribbon. A few were with your mother, but all of us have seen a battle or two." She answered, returning to their former conversation.  
  
"I still find it hard to believe that mother was a part of this." She gestured around, but it was a restrained gesture-barely hiding her fear. "Mother was always so calm, so peaceful."  
  
"Yes, Theodwyn was like a water. But you know what they say, still waters run deep." She turned at a sound and for the first time Eowyn noticed that her ears were not like hers. They were pointed at the top. "Be ready. The battle is about to begin." Nudging her horse forward, she rode up to Idis and they conversed in whispers for a while.  
  
Queen Idis rode to the head of the line and spoke. The sense of urgency in her voice quieted their discussions and they focused on her. "I know how ferocious, how dangerous, they look. They are."  
  
There was some nervous laughter, so she waited patiently for it to die down before she continued to speak. "Do not underestimate them. That will lead to our downfall. On the field, I want you to focus on the battle, to concentrate on yourself. But the thing I want you to remember, the most important thing while out there fighting, is that we are a team. Not one of us will win this battle alone, we must work together. If you are in trouble, do not be afraid to call for help. There is no shame in asking for assistance."  
  
Eowyn shifted nervously, stopping herself almost before she moved. She'd been hoping that Idis' words would quiet the nervous feelings swimming inside. But her stomach only tied itself into tighter knots. The hand that gripped her sword tightened reflexively as the moments ticked by.  
  
A horrible scream suddenly rent the air, sending chills through them.  
  
It was all they could do to keep still. Their tight control over their horses held them in place though the tense energy seemed to transfer to them. Idis turned to face the oncoming horde with deadly calm, her arm raised in the air. They waited, watching as the enemy came closer to them. Horrible faces, a mockery of life, approached their line at an ever quickening pace.  
  
Still, Idis waited as calm as the mountains around them. It was not in them to question her. But the closer the enemy got to them, the faster their blood flowed. Nervous energy built to an almost screaming level. It was all they could do to remain in their saddles so tense were they.  
  
When her gleaming sword dropped, the women rushed forward with battle cries of the own. Energy was released onto the force in a onslaught of sword and spear expertise.  
  
Eowyn was lost in the press of bodies. Everywhere was mass chaos. Blood and pain surrounded her, clouding her vision. Never before had she heard such screams. Fear crept over her, the temptation to flee filled her body. An orc leapt at her from nowhere, startling her. The horse she rode reared back, kicking wildly in the air. Keeping a tight grip on the reigns with one hand, her other lashed out with the sword. The smell of spilt blood hung in the air as the death toll rose.  
  
Helena sought her out once the battle was over. "How are you?"  
  
The pale face turned up towards her, the loss of innocence was in her eyes. There was no need for words, her look said it all.  
  
"The first battle is always the worst." She sat down by Eowyn's side, not caring that she flinched from the contact. "But do not ever let it become just another battle to you." The warning was clear in her voice.  
  
"I don't think I ever could." Her voice was strained. Obviously trying to hold back the tears straining against her control. Death all around, only matches the death inside my body, she thought.  
  
Helena looked her in the eyes. "Yes, you could. Battles have a tendency to swallow people whole."  
  
"Why would anyone want to live this way? I hate it." Raw.  
  
"Do not let that hate eat you." Helena warned. "Who taught you that you could not cry, Kittiwake?"  
  
"No one." She whispered, turning away.  
  
The strong arm of her teacher pulled her close. "Cry, Kittiwake."  
  
"I do not want to be seen as weak." It was said fiercely. But her head rested on Helena's shoulder, seeking the strength that lay there.  
  
"There is no weakness in crying. It is merely a purging of what has poisoned you." She said, running her hand through the blonde hair. "Even I will cry when my work is done, Eowyn."  
  
And though she didn't want to, she did.  
  
Part 4:  
  
Helena:  
  
"How did you get so smart?" Eowyn asked Helena one day as they were washing clothes.  
  
"Life." She answered, glancing at her, curiously. "Life is the greatest teacher. And I listen."  
  
"Hmmm." She murmured.  
  
"Why?"  
  
Eowyn looked at her before wringing out the shirt in her hands and hanging it up. She shrugged.  
  
"I asked you a question, Eowyn." There was a warning note in her voice and she used her proper name.  
  
Picking up some more clothes, she dumped them in the hot water and stirred them with the large, wooden spoon. "No reason. It is just that you are smarter than anyone I've ever known. There's something different about you and it isn't just your physical appearance, though it is unusual."  
  
"Different." She sighed, leaning back. "Yes, I suppose to you I am different."  
  
"I meant no offense. There's nothing wrong with being different." Eowyn quickly said.  
  
Those blue eyes stared at her, studying her through some kind of microscope. She was meet and shocked by the sincerity in the younger girl's eyes. "Then you are wiser than I for it took me years to accept that."  
  
"But you always seem so sure of yourself. I envy that."  
  
"Don't." It was harsh. Then there was another deep sigh. "I'm sorry, Kittiwake. I probably don't make any sense to you. My life has not been pleasant before I came here."  
  
The young woman shrugged adding more soap. "It has made you who you are."  
  
"Yes, but at a terrible price." She was silent, watching her work. "As you know, I trained with Idis and your mother. But…it took me a long time to accept that I was not meant for a quiet life. As an elf, we do not like to engage in warfare. That surprises you, didn't you know what I was?"  
  
"No." Her voice was faint. "I had no idea. Where are you from?"  
  
"I was born among a group of traveling elves. Even then I was different, more comfortable with the boys than the girls. I was adept at hunting rather than singing, hard riding to the study of the world's mysteries. How much do you know about the ways of elves?"  
  
"Not much, I'm afraid. Father always said that elves were mystics and their ways a mystery to us."  
  
She shook her head. "We aren't that much different than man, though we like to pretend that we are. We live longer and have seen more of the world. In some cases, we posses magical abilities. I do not tell you this to frighten you, just to make you aware."  
  
Eowyn nodded. "So, how did you come to be here?"  
  
"I met up with a wizard-no, not Mithrandir." She said with a smile. "He is the most traveled but there are others. She was one of the most fascinating woman I've ever met. I believe she would've been a high priestess but her powers were different. Callie was her name. She joined our group and traveled with us for a while. She saw my struggles to fit in where I thought I belonged, told me I was selling myself short. My talents were needed, and necessary, in this world. I should not be ashamed. It was the same thing my mother had told me, what the Lady Galadriel said when we visited Lothlorien. I was to stubborn to listen, wanting only to be like everyone else."  
  
Eowyn shook her head, trying to hide a smile.  
  
"Go ahead and laugh, but it was true. I didn't want to hear it. The one thing I didn't want to do was stand out. In my mind, there was a stigma attached to those who were different. It wasn't until I met Narvanata that mind set changed."  
  
"You knew her?"  
  
"She was the fourth of our number." Helena said quietly. "Her story is one of pain that I will not tell you for it is not my right. Suffice it to say that I was able to help her out of a dangerous situation she couldn't escape unaided. I helped her, then traveled with her until we stumbled upon I'opia. She was with a group of novices, leading them in a purification ceremony before their final induction into our society. You remember your own?"  
  
Eowyn nodded, thinking back to her own vigil. Since the journey was one of the spirit more than the flesh, I'opia and Rylia sent her out. They had given her the instructions for what she was to do and accomplish. It was a difficult task to go out into the wilderness and survive on her own. But it was something that they all did. The travel would test your spirit, help you see if this was the path you really wanted.  
  
It wasn't that it was terribly harsh, their teachers made sure they knew how to survive. Everything they did was geared for this moment. Even the tiniest, most insignificant thing was designed to help them in their survival hike. If one paid attention, there was nothing that they couldn't overcome. It was being alone that really tested their soul.  
  
When they went out, they avoided all contact with living beings-save the animals. It was enough to drive a person mad with loneliness. And it didn't help that Rangers were free to roam the area-even the land the maidens dwelled upon.  
  
These trained men had made it extremely difficult to avoid meeting them because of their extensive knowledge. There had been this one fellow who had been particularly determined to find out who was sharing the woods with him.  
  
Suddenly, some of Helena's more unorthodox teachings made sense. "So, that's why I was able to avoid that guy. What did you say his name was? Strider-even though he'd been raised by elves."  
  
Helena nodded, a smile on her face. She knew what Eowyn was referring to. And though she knew it was ridiculous, the thought that she had trained someone who could avoid that particular Ranger filled her with a sense of pride. "I often wondered why you never questioned me about that. It never occurred to me that you did not know my heritage."  
  
They folded the clothes in silence for a few minutes, but it was a companionable silence. Then Eowyn spoke to her again. "You saw a purification ceremony even though outside eyes are forbidden to do so?"  
  
"It was like I was supposed to be there. I found a sense of home in her presence. My doubts died away when she looked at me." She was quiet, reflective. "To this day I cannot describe what made me do it but when she invited us to join her, I went. And never looked back."  
  
"Is your hair normal for elves?" She asked.  
  
"No. It was an accident with blueberries." Helena's face was calm.  
  
Her eyes widened in shock and she stared at her teacher, mouth open slightly. "You're kidding."  
  
"Would I do that to you, Kittiwake?" She asked, finishing the clothes in front of her. "You better hurry, it is almost dinnertime."  
  
In the distance, the dinner bell rang. She waited patiently until the younger woman was done. Then the two warriors stood up and, carrying their workload between them, walked home.  
  
~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Wait, you knew Aragorn?" Merry asked, breaking into her story when he felt it was appropriate.  
  
"Aragorn?" She asked him, confused. "No, what does he have to do with anything?"  
  
"Didn't you know? Strider is Aragorn." Merry explained.  
  
Eowyn nodded slowly. "That would explain a few things. No, I never met nor saw Strider. I only knew his name because Helena told me."  
  
"I see." He said slowly. They listened to the birds trill in the distance for a moment. "So, why were you with King Theoden when we came?"  
  
"Can't you guess how that came about, dear Merry?" She asked softly and waited a moment before resuming her tale.  
  
Part 5:  
  
The Call Home:  
  
It was a chilly morn when Eowyn was roused from her slumber by a rapid knock on her door. "Rouse yourself, Kittiwake." Helena called out. "We have visitors approaching the boundary."  
  
"Friend or foe?" She asked, voice muffled slightly by the shirt. Grabbing a knife, she tied it to her thigh after pulling on pants. On her upper arm, she placed three bands that showed her allegiance and rank in the core.  
  
"I believe it to be more kin than kith." Helena said, waiting for her.  
  
The door opened and she stepped out. "Kin?" It was a hopeful note, she hadn't seen her family in years. Even thought they had defeated the orcs about a year ago, they had not gone to the capital to give their report. Silently, they made there way to the waiting horses. Along with Idis and a few chosen warriors, they rode out to meet them.  
  
As they approached the border, they found the men waiting for them. Some were warily watching the guards, who were staring back just as suspiciously. "Eomer, what brings you here?" Queen Idis rode forward, gesturing that the others stay back. I'opia walked up with her.  
  
"Business, Queen Idis." He responded, getting off his horse and bowing before her. The rest of the men followed his lead.  
  
She dismounted as well, bowing before him gracefully. Eowyn stayed mounted, as did the rest of the women. "What business brings you so far from home? When aid is needed, it usually comes by air."  
  
"I realize that, majesty." He hesitated, glancing around. "This is not something that should be spoken of in the open. Is there not someplace we could go to speak?"  
  
Idis exchanged looks with I'opia. The high priestess moved forward, her eyes examining all the men assembled before her. "Those three must stay out here." Her wizened hand pointed to the men who were standing a little behind everyone. "Their hearts are intent on mischief."  
  
Eomer nodded, feeling his skin crawl just a little bit. What the wise woman had said confirmed his suspicions about the three who had joined them at the last minute. Still, it was unnerving to hear the words. His uncle had warned him to be prepared but he had said it only in passing. He wished that he'd been more prepared for what waited for them.  
  
Raising her arms and then moving her hands so quickly that the gesture was hidden to all, the shield protecting them dropped. "You may pass save the three. Do not feel that you can trifle with me just because I am old." She invited, but warned them as well.  
  
When the invited were in, she raised the shields once more. Turning to face them, she bowed and addressed them. "Welcome, you who are dear as brothers." She turned to the women who guarded the entrance. "Watch those three. Though they are out there, they are still dangerous." Then she turned and vanished.  
  
Eomer and the men followed Queen Idis and her company into the heart of their lands. Unlike his men, he was not watching the path or studying the area. He was looking for his sister, would she even remember him? More importantly, would she honor his request?  
  
Helena glanced back at the young captain and saw his dilemma. "Ride back, Kittiwake. Your brother is most anxious to see you."  
  
"Is that allowed?" She asked, looking up at Idis' stern profile. Though she was now acknowledge one of them, she still feared being a disappointment to them all.  
  
"There is nothing written that says you cannot." She answered, nudging the girl's horse. "Go on."  
  
Slowing down, Eowyn waited for Eomer and moved beside him, ignoring the whispers of the men.   
  
Eomer was surprised when one of the warriors joined him and turned to face her. Beside him, on a black horse, was a confident and poised woman. She was tanned and had firm muscles, on her hip was a whip. He had seen a whip like that used in battle, only the most dedicated could use one.   
  
"Hello, Eomer, brother." She spoke in a quiet voice, wearying of his study.  
  
He was startled. This was his sister? He would've doubted but for the blonde hair and the hazel eyes that were their mother's, he didn't think that any one else could have that combination. This was not the slip of a girl he remembered. Eowyn had grown into womanhood. "Eowyn?" Eomer asked quietly, unable to disguise the shock in his voice.  
  
She laughed. "Have I so changed that I am unrecognizable to my own brother?"  
  
"Well, you don't look much like the girl I remembered."  
  
"I grew up, as we all must." She was quiet, nodding to some of the men she recognized. "Uncle is not well, is he?"  
  
"No." Eomer shook his head, but it was a subtle move. "The men do not know how serious it is yet."  
  
"And the three that I'opia didn't let in?" She was prodding gently.  
  
"They are men of one of uncle's new advisors, a man named Grima." His voice was deadened, as though he tried to keep his feelings out of his words.  
  
A shiver of fear ran down her spine. Helena seemed to feel it and glanced back at them, a question in her eyes. She was quick to join them. "I take it he is not a good man." Eowyn said.  
  
Eomer nodded at Helena, remembering her. "I don't want to judge but I feel in my gut that he means uncle harm."  
  
"Who?" Helena asked, her shoulders were tense.  
  
"Grima." They said in unison.  
  
A stone would've shown more emotion than she at that moment. "He is an evil man."  
  
"You have heard of him?" Eomer asked.  
  
"Yes. I have even had the displeasure of meeting him." She answered, turning to Eowyn. "You have seen him, Kittiwake. Do you remember the first night of camp?"  
  
"That man with the creepy eyes who was watching me?" She nodded slowly, trying to stop the cold that was stealing through her soul.  
  
"That would be him. Queen Idis must be warned of this. It would not do for her to be unprepared for your announcement." She left them.  
  
"Don't worry, Eomer. Helena is discreet. No one save the four of us will know until you've spoken."  
  
"What about that wise woman?"  
  
"I'opia. She knew before you set foot on our borders. There is very little that the wind does not take to her ears." Eowyn answered. "I would not fear to much over her."  
  
"Is she always so…startling?"  
  
Eowyn considered his question, then shook her head. "I'm not sure I understand what you mean. If you mean the nature of her appearances and disappearances, then yes."  
  
Eomer chuckled, just a little bit. "No. I mean, she has a way of looking through one that seems rather unnatural."  
  
"It is what she does. As high priestess, one of her jobs is to help us to do better. The first time it happens, it does frighten one. Over time, you get used to it."  
  
"So, she is a spiritual guide." He guessed. "I guess that intimidating people is a good thing then."  
  
Her face when she turned to him was serious. There was respect and awe in her eyes. "She is more than that, Eomer, so much more. I'opia is indeed a spirit guide. But she is also counselor to the queen, healer, prophetess, teller of tales. About the only thing she isn't is a warrior. But don't thing that she can't fight, she can. It just isn't her main duty."  
  
"She sounds like one impressive woman." Eomer quietly said.  
  
"She is." Eowyn was silent, recalling when she'd been sent to study with her for a year. It had been quite an experience in taking leaps of faith. The one thing above all the things she'd learned from her was to rely on her intuition more than what her eyes told her.  
  
Eyes, she was told, can be easily deceived. But you gut never will be as long as you learn to hone it and listen to it. It will sometimes be your only defense in this world.  
  
Eomer tapped her on the shoulder and she looked over at him, curiously. "Where did you go?"  
  
"I was just remembering some things."   
  
"What is with that name Helena called you? Kittiwake?"  
  
"That is what I am known as here. It is a way to protect me." She said, with a smile. "Enough about me, what have you been up to?"  
  
He accepted the change in conversation with good humor. "The usual. I've been training. Did some fighting recently, I hear you were there?" It was a slight question.  
  
"Yes." Her voice was subdued.  
  
"It wasn't anything like we thought battles were, was it?" He was subdued as well.  
  
"No." She waited for a moment, trying to put into words what she'd felt. "It was the most horrible thing I have ever done."  
  
"Felt like you were going to be swallowed up in the dark of the hate surrounding you." He agreed with both her spoken and unspoken words. "I couldn't sleep for days after it was over."  
  
"The faces and voice kept echoing in my mind." She agreed, falling silent.  
  
"War may be hell but it has its place." He commented, then was silent as well.  
  
Queen Idis turned from her talk with Helena and saw them, she raised an eyebrow slightly. Eowyn urged her horse forward, shaking her head at her brother. She was riding by Tacatta and the woman looked at her curiously. "Who was that?"  
  
"My brother, Eomer." She was quiet. "Do you think I made Queen Idis mad?"  
  
"By talking to your brother? No." Tacatta shook her head. "It takes more than that to upset her. I think she's heard something distasteful."  
  
"Hmmm." It was a non-committal sound.  
  
Tacatta's eyes sharpened. "You know something, don't you?" Then she seemed to slap herself. With an apologetic look, she smiled sheepishly at her. "Forget I said anything, Kittiwake. It isn't my business until Queen Idis says something to us."  
  
"Already forgotten." Eowyn murmured. Luckily for her, they rode into camp and Idis signaled for them to dismount.  
  
As he company disbanded, she gave them her orders for the days activities. "Tacatta, Kittiwake, you will go and learn from Narvanata this day. It will be her privilege to chose what your lessons. Eomer, you and your men will come with me now. Helena, as soon as you've cleared a place for the men, join me." There was no doubt that she wanted to get the situation sorted as quickly as possible.  
  
Eowyn watched for a moment before going with Tacatta. Narvanata was waiting for them, two piles of fish at her feet. "These need to be salted for storing." She pointed at one pile, then towards the others. "These are to be gutted for our meal tonight. I honestly don't know what she's thinking bringing those men here." She muttered.  
  
"There doesn't seem to be enough." Tacatta said.  
  
"There isn't. After we have finished these, we will go hunting for more." Brisk, No-nonsense. That was how Narvanata handled everything. She was a brilliant trader and her haggling skills knew no rival, at least among them. Previous to becoming a shield maiden, Narvanata was a sailor. Eowyn knew this because she had asked while learning to fish with her.  
  
Over the feast, Eowyn was called to sit by Queen Idis. "Kittiwake, your brother wants you to go back with him." She spoke in a soft voice, barely above a whisper. Yet Eowyn heard every word clearly.  
  
"Must I?"  
  
"I have told him that it is your choice alone." Idis said. "But I'opia is of the opinion that you should go back. Think on it carefully."  
  
"What is there to think about? My uncle is in danger. I cannot in all good conscience, nor honor, turn him away." She sighed.  
  
"You know this means going right into the heart of a human dragon." Idis warned.  
  
Eowyn nodded. "I know. But what would you do? Could you turn your back on him?"  
  
"Go with the goddess, daughter of my heart."  
  
~~~~~~~~~  
  
"So, knowing what Wormtongue was, your brother wanted you to go home?" Merry asked. "That seems so wrong."  
  
"My brother felt that my presence might help uncle come to his senses. What is wrong in that?"  
  
"Nothing-except he left you no real protection from that beast." Merry stated firmly.  
  
She smiled slightly. "Merry, I was a fully trained warrior. There was no way Wormtongue could've hurt me."  
  
"But you would have done nothing against him for fear that he would harm your uncle." Merry said, watching her. "I know you, Eowyn. I saw the way he was looking at you, the way you would shrivel up when he looked at you. How long was it before he hurt you?"  
  
"It wasn't bad. Not at first, he seemed to be afraid of my reputation. But the longer I stayed silent, the more confidant he grew. It became harder to find places to escape him." Her eyes closed in remembered agony.  
  
"And I bet you still feel him. Feel that touch on you, forcing you to do things that are against your nature." It was said softly, but with some understanding. He knew, to a certain extent, what she felt like.  
  
"Yes." She gasped, wrapping her arms around her. Trying in vain to hold herself together, to not yield to her tears.  
  
"Yet you live every day, you continue to survive what he did." He stood up and approached her. Ever so gently, he rested his hand on her shoulder as he sat down. "You haven't let his memory hold you back, Kittiwake." Her name came easily to his lips. It was like she'd been waiting to hear it because she slipped off the bench and, resting her head in his lap, cried for the second time in as many days.  
  
He waited until he knew she was done crying before speaking. "What you said earlier about being a coward, I don't believe a word of it. You are one of the bravest people I have ever had the privilege to met, Eowyn. I just wish you could see that for yourself."  
  
The sound of a throat clearing broke into their quiet atmosphere. "Gandalf?" Merry questioned, a little doubtfully. "What are you doing here?"  
  
"Merry, would you excuse me and the Lady Eowyn for a moment. I need to speak to her." His face was grave.  
  
He looked at the woman for her permission. She slowly nodded. "I won't be far away."  
  
"Just be far enough away that you do not hear what I have to say." Gandalf said sternly. She stood up slowly and turned to face him. "I need a favor of you, Lady Eowyn. But I need you to hear me out."  
  
"Very well. What is it?"  
  
"It is about Aragorn. He's in danger." He waited, and though she wanted to say something, she held her tongue. With a sad smile, he continued. "Though the ring was destroyed, apparently that was not what was holding Sauron here. Aragorn was captured. You are one of the few people we know who can get in and rescue him. Will you do it?"  
  
Eowyn stared at him, disbelief in her eyes. Her mouth opened, then closed, not a sound escaping it.  
  
"Are you all right?" Gandalf asked, concerned for her.  
  
"Are you mad? You want me to go into Sauron's stronghold to rescue a man who does not care for the fact that I entered the battlefield? A man who probably thinks that I fought only because I couldn't have him. He would balk at the idea of my rescuing him. I doubt he'd leave with me once I've found him for spite."  
  
"Don't you think you're selling him short?"  
  
"Considering that it was his word that stopped my uncle from sending for the Shield Maidens to help in the battle? And stopped me from going with either party? No."  
  
"A man's life is in your hands. How can you turn your back on him?" Gandalf asked, coming to stand before her. "Could you live with yourself if he died, knowing that you could have prevented it?"  
  
"You mentioned others. Let them do it." She was being stubborn, shutting his words out of her mind.  
  
"No one else can."  
  
"That's not what you said before." Eowyn was suspicious.  
  
"I believed that you would agree if you thought there would be some help for you." He explained, sitting down. "They are all dead or missing."  
  
"Obviously, you were wrong about me." She was blunt.  
  
His head shook. "I don't think I was. You're hurt but I know you are as honorable as he. His life is in your hands, Eowyn. Please, save him for all our sakes." 


	3. Ending or is it a Beginning?

***  
  
Gandalf's words would not leave Eowyn's mind. As a result, she had a restless night. Visions of an enslaved world plagued her thoughts. Toss and turn though she might, she could not escape the certainty of what was to be if Aragorn remained where he was.  
  
Pale and weary, body aching, she rose the next morning, weak. Going outside, she breathed in the air and began to walk aimlessly, before her feet led her eastward. Climbing the wall, she looked around her. The sky over Mordor darkened menacingly. Venomous clouds drifted their ways, shoving and eating the paler clouds on their journey.  
  
This, then, was to be their future.  
  
Behind her, a small cry pierced the early morning's peace. A baby was born to greet this world. A world decorated with hatred and despair. Twisting painfully inside, her heart reminded her of its existence. No longer protected by cold, it felt every little pain that surrounded her.  
  
A small bird landed on her arm, careful not to irritate the break further. Still, she gasped in pain, looking down.  
  
'A kittiwake,' she breathed. Hand shaking, she accepted the proffered note. 'Go. And go now.'  
  
The three underlines marked the urgency of sped. With a renewed determination, the White Lady of the Rohirrim disappeared into her room. Emerging moments later, dressed in a dark brown with her arm bound tightly to her waist, she left the House of Healing behind.  
  
Making her way to the stables, she saddled her horse and led him to the gates. Carefully making their way under the noses of the posted guards, they left the last wall behind them with a sigh of relief.  
  
"Where are you going, Eowyn?"  
  
Gasping, she whirled around. Unable to believe her eyes, she blinked and rubbed them. "Merry?"  
  
He bowed, cheerfully joining her, "so, where are we going?"  
  
She walked off, determined to ignore him, though it pained her to do so. Merry knew what she was up to and remained steadfast. They walked for several hours before she faced him, "why are you still here?"  
  
"Because I am a squire and you are my lady knight," simple said, "where else would I be?"  
  
"Safe. In Gondor."  
  
"There is no safety in this world as long as that cloud hangs in the horizon."  
  
No reply. Eowyn would not refute the truth she heard in his words. To do so would dishonor both of them and she respected him too much to do belittle him. "I am going on a rescue mission," she spoke quietly. "And you cannot come with me."  
  
Merry's calm eyes met her own, "whither thou goest, I go. And where you sleep, I will sleep. If I am called to lay my life down to save your own, then I shall. Bid me not to leave thee, for I will only follow."  
  
She could only swallow, holding back tears. "We are Mordor bound." With those words, she mounted her horse. Looking down at him, she challenged his resolve.  
  
"My legs have grown long. My back is strong to bear many burdens," he would not back down. "I would prefer to ride with you, but I will go on foot, if necessary."  
  
"No need, sir Merriadoc." Reaching out her hand, they clasped and she pulled him up. With the slightest pressure from her leg, they were off.  
  
After a few moments of silence, Merry tapped her shoulder. "If you don't mind my asking, how are we to get there? The front gates are sure to be bared. And we lack the guide Frodo and Sam had."  
  
"We ride through a forgotten path, known only now to those of my line. It will be dangerous for none have traveled those paths in ages. But we must make all haste," her reply was blunt. She was not going to blind him to the truth of their journey.  
  
The horse gathered sped and headed towards the moments, gaining strength to make the arduous climb. Merry held onto Eowyn, knowing that he was doing the right thing. Together, they would make it through, as they had against the witch king.  
  
Filled with a dreadful kind of certainty once more, Eowyn guided them along. Hang on, Aragorn, she thought. We're coming.  
  
Merry's presence comforted and strengthened her. Hobbits were curious creatures of gentle strength and tremendous courage. Before this adventure was over, she'd need that to survive.  
  
*  
  
*  
  
*  
  
*  
  
*  
  
*  
  
*  
  
*  
  
*  
  
Author's Note: I felt the urge to write an actual ending to this story. The story of Eowyn as a sheild maiden did end here and another adventure began. I hope that this will satisfy everyone who reads this. Once more, I thank all of you who have read and responded to my work. Thank you for your kindness and encouragement, I appreciate it so much. If ever I feel compelled to write a sequel, you'll be the first to know.  
  
Thank you all for your words, they do help inspire me. 


End file.
